Dec 14, 2024: Athena C. Monson, The Cat Cuddle Spectrum

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This is part of our yearly Advent Calendar, which publishes an essay a day each year during advent. Find the rest of this year's and previous years' calendars here. 

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The Cat Cuddle Spectrum

Athena C. Monson

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Cats are known for many things, and one of those things is cuddles. Cuddles are the best part of cat ownership for many, and a good cuddle has many benefits. But at what age do cats generally offer the best cuddles? In this essay the quality of cat cuddles and how it correlates with age will be discussed. (The info ahead is general, as quality and the best age for cuddles depends on your cat. People also like different things in their cuddles, so this essay will mention what type of cuddles the age is best for.) 

First of all, kittens. Kittens are little, kind of clumsy, and generally trusting. Due to those traits, kittens cuddles are reliable and easy to get. They are not likely to make you struggle to breathe, but, for people who prefer a heavy cat on them they are not sufficient. Another downside is that, due to kitten clumsiness, they may accidentally scratch you. Overall rating would be 7/10.

Next, young adult cats, specifically of the 1-5 age range. Those cats will retain some of their kittenish excitement, but are likely to have it be a little toned down. Their friendliness level depends on when you met them, as cats you knew as kittens will be much friendlier than cats you just met. Generally, young adults are quite adaptable and relatively friendly. Those traits make them good cuddlers, as their cuddles are generally pretty available, and they are less clumsy than kittens, meaning less likely to accidentally scratch you. Weight wise, they are mid-range, heavier than kittens but generally at most plump. They get an 8/10 for being solid cuddlers, but not very specialized.

Now, middle-aged cats in the 5-10 age range. These cats are often pretty fat, and are less adaptable and often a bit less friendly. This means that they are the best for people who want heavy cuddles, their cuddles may be sparse, and they are the most likely to crush you. Overall, they get a 6/10 for only being good for one type of cuddles and having plentiful downsides.

Lastly, elderly cats, those who are 10+. They are not very adaptable, and often lose some of their senses, making them a bit more precarious. While some elderly cats may still be fat, most descend to a skinny size. They are generally still sweet, but they can be spooked more easily, and also may struggle with mobility, meaning that the places that they can cuddle in are more limited. Their weight varies too much to assign a cuddle weight to them. It is hard to give elderly cats a rating, as they vary far too much. Some may be very good cuddlers, while others may not be as good. I’d give them a range of 3/10 to 9/10.

Those are all the age cuddling ranges. If you disagree with a rating, remember that these are generalized and your cat could be different.

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Athena C. Monson offers no bio but is the author of the monthly short story subscription service Black Wolf Stories. For $2 you get a story each month in your email. Sign up today!